Day 134 – 2 Samuel 13:1-22
Scripture Review
2 Samuel 13:1-22
"And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her."
(2 Samuel 13:1)
Absalom has a sister named Tamar, and she is described as "fair," meaning beautiful. Amnon, another son of David, is said to have loved her. This is David's house becoming exposed in the Bible.
"And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do any thing to her."
(2 Samuel 13:2)
Amnon's desire becomes an obsession. He is so troubled in his mind and body that he becomes sick over Tamar. The Bible also tells me she was a virgin, which means she was unmarried and guarded in the king's house. Amnon knows there is no proper way to get to her, and that frustrates him.
"But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother: and Jonadab was a very subtil man."
(2 Samuel 13:3)
Amnon has a friend named Jonadab. He is related to David's family, and the Bible says he is "very subtil." meaning he is crafty, clever, and cunning. Amnon is already in a dangerous state of mind, and now the wrong kind of friend comes close to him. That is a good reminder that a sinful desire becomes even more dangerous when it finds a clever counselor.
"And he said unto him, Why art thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day? wilt thou not tell me? And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister."
(2 Samuel 13:4)
Jonadab notices Amnon looking thin and weak, and he asks him what is wrong. Amnon tells him plainly, "I love Tamar." He wants Tamar, but he is not thinking about her purity, her future, or her soul.
"And Jonadab said unto him, Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick: and when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come, and give me meat, and dress the meat in my sight, that I may see it, and eat it at her hand."
(2 Samuel 13:5)
Jonadab gives Amnon a plan. He tells him to pretend to be sick and wait for David to visit him. Then he is supposed to ask David to send Tamar to prepare food for him. This wicked plan uses David's concern as a father, and Tamar's kindness as the trap. Jonadab does not rebuke Amnon's desire. He teaches him how to act on it.
"So Amnon lay down, and made himself sick: and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come, and make me a couple of cakes in my sight, that I may eat at her hand."
(2 Samuel 13:6)
Amnon does exactly what Jonadab told him to do. He lies down and pretends to be sick. When David comes to check on him, Amnon asks for Tamar to come and make cakes for him. David thinks he is helping a sick son, but he does not know he is being used in Amnon's scheme.
"Then David sent home to Tamar, saying, Go now to thy brother Amnon's house, and dress him meat."
(2 Samuel 13:7)
David sends Tamar to Amnon's house. As I read this, I see Tamar obeying her father. She has no reason to think evil is waiting for her. David gives the instruction, and she goes.
"So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house; and he was laid down. And she took flour, and kneaded it, and made cakes in his sight, and did bake the cakes."
(2 Samuel 13:8)
Tamar goes to Amnon's house and begins serving him. She takes flour, kneads it, makes cakes, and bakes them while he watches. She is doing exactly what she was asked to do. She is acting with kindness, obedience, and innocence. Meanwhile, Amnon is lying there with evil in his heart.
"And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him."
(2 Samuel 13:9)
Tamar brings the food to Amnon, but he refuses to eat. Then he orders everyone else out of the room. He wants to be alone with Tamar, and the servants leave.
"And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand. And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother."
(2 Samuel 13:10)
Amnon now tells Tamar to bring the food into the private chamber. Tamar still does not appear to suspect anything. She brings the cakes to him as he asked. The Scripture keeps reminding me that she is his sister and that he is her brother. That makes this sin even more awful.
"And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister."
(2 Samuel 13:11)
Amnon takes hold of Tamar and tells her to lie with him. He uses force and speaks wickedly to his own sister. This is where his so called love shows itself for what it really is. It is not love. It is lust, selfishness, and violence.
"And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly."
(2 Samuel 13:12)
Tamar immediately resists. She says, "Nay, my brother, do not force me." She tells him this kind of thing should not be done in Israel. She calls it "folly," which means wicked foolishness. Tamar understands the evil clearly, and she tries to stop him with truth, reason, and moral warning.
"And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee."
(2 Samuel 13:13)
Tamar continues pleading. She tells Amnon this will bring shame upon her, and it will make him known as one of the fools in Israel. She is trying to make him think about the consequences. She even suggests that he speak to the king instead of forcing her. She is doing everything she can to reason with him and turn him away from evil.
"Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her."
(2 Samuel 13:14)
Amnon refuses to listen to Tamar. He is stronger than she is, and he forces her. The Bible does not soften what happened. He violates her. Tamar's voice was ignored. Her pleading was rejected. Her purity was taken by force. This is wickedness in David's own house.
"Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone."
(2 Samuel 13:15)
After Amnon gets what he wanted, his feelings turn to hatred. The Bible says his hatred became greater than the love he claimed before. This shows me that his first desire was never real love. Lust takes, and then it despises. He tells Tamar to get up and leave, as though she is the problem.
"And she said unto him, There is no cause: this evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me. But he would not hearken unto her."
(2 Samuel 13:16)
Tamar tells him there is no reason to send her away and that this second evil is adding more shame to what he has already done. In that culture, being cast out after being violated would deepen her disgrace. But again, Amnon will not listen.
"Then he called his servant that ministered unto him, and said, Put now this woman out from me, and bolt the door after her."
(2 Samuel 13:17)
Amnon calls his servant and says, "Put now this woman out from me." He does not even speak of her respectfully. He treats her like some trash or dog to be removed. Then he tells the servant to bolt the door after her. He used secrecy to sin, and now he uses a locked door to reject her.
"And she had a garment of divers colours upon her: for with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled. Then his servant brought her out, and bolted the door after her."
(2 Samuel 13:18)
The Bible tells me about Tamar's garment. It was a garment of divers colours, the kind worn by the king's virgin daughters. That garment showed her place, her purity, and her honor. But now she is brought out and the door is bolted behind her. She is dressed as a royal daughter, but she is treated with shame and cruelty.
"And Tamar put ashes on her head, and rent her garment of divers colours that was on her, and laid her hand on her head, and went on crying."
(2 Samuel 13:19)
Tamar now openly mourns. She puts ashes on her head, tears her garment, lays her hand on her head, and goes away crying. These are outward signs of grief, shame, and deep sorrow. She does not hide the pain. Her cry tells everyone something terrible has happened. As I read this, I cannot help but feel Tamar wounded here.
"And Absalom her brother said unto her, Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee? but hold now thy peace, my sister: he is thy brother; regard not this thing. So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house."
(2 Samuel 13:20)
Absalom sees her and seems to understand what happened. He asks if Amnon has been with her. But then he tells her to hold her peace because Amnon is her brother. Tamar then remains desolate in Absalom's house. That word "desolate"is heartbreaking. She is alive, but something has been taken from her. She is sheltered by Absalom, but she is not restored.
"But when king David heard of all these things, he was very wroth."
(2 Samuel 13:21)
David hears about what happened, and he becomes very angry. Any father should be angry over such evil. But the verse does not speak of any action taken by David. It only says he was very wroth. Anger is not the same as justice. Being upset is not the same as dealing with sin.
"And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar."
(2 Samuel 13:22)
Scripture ends with Absalom's silence. He does not speak to Amnon, either good or bad. But the Bible tells me what is happening inside him, he hates Amnon because he forced Tamar. So now there is violated innocence, an angry father, a silent brother, and hatred growing inside the family. Nathan had already told David that the sword would not depart from his house, and now I begin to see that word taking shape. This is trouble inside the royal family. Amnon, David's son, Tamar, David's daughter, and Absalom, David's son, are all brought before me in a painful family tragedy. The sword is not outside David's house anymore. It is inside.